"Be glad that you may clear the past karmas with the gradualness of embers slowly burning until ashes are all that remain. And even the ashes become the dust that scatters with the next breeze that comes and are dissolved by the rains.
You are what remains when all else is dispersed and washed away."
You may be looking for the flash of enlightenment like Saul transforming into Paul on the road to Damascus, but remember that the slow burning ember and the lightning strike can lead to the same essence.
Ride the waves of your karma no matter how long it takes and pray for the Grace to come and wash away all that is not you.
Hold the focus on what you want and keep on keeping on.
This is the Master's Path.